Thursday, June 30, 2016

Take Five: You Suck at Parenting (The Cereal Edition)





by Da CogNegro:

They say breakfast is the most important meal of the day, right? Well, "they" obviously haven't met the makers of these sugar infested inventions known to include free juvenile insulin pumps. And guess what, you caused this! Instead of ignoring the tantrums of your spoiled brat, you decided to send him or her a one way ticket to a Cedric The Entertainer Public Service announcement by given in to their banshee howls and Hamilton marches conducted to the disgust and delight, of all present in supermarkets across the country . Anyway, what's done is done!



5.
CogNegro's Take: If you fed this to your children at any times during  their formative years, you deserved to be stuffed inside that specially marked duffel bag!




4.
CogNegro's Take: All out of donuts cereal? Don't worry, I'm sure a bowl of sprinkles will be able to provide your children the nutrients they need
3.


CogNegro's Take: 
As if little Jimmy didn't already have a difficult time reciting his alphabet in school, this "balanced" breakfast of ice cram cones and sweetened milk will only enhance this kid's ability to bounce off the walls like a Pokemon who's been charged with multiple DWI(s) and late child support while being locked away in solitary confinement!


2.
CogNegro's Take: Artificially Flavored? Clearly you jest! What can be more natural than a cereal based on a candy that has been known to cause Vietnam night terrors in lab rats? Oh wait, did that say two flavors?! Yes, that means we get double the spoonfuls of Minotaur hooves and pencil shavings!


1.
CogNegro's Take: Now this entry has nothing to do with sugar content at all but when did Sandusky get out? Allowing even a portrait of this man to enter your home shows that you are more clueless than a Kardashian during Final Jeopardy. And about that nest egg you've got stowed away for the kids' college fund, you may want to save that for their therapy sessions, due to their meth addiction, that's sure to follow after going on King Vitamin's  "Treasure Hunt".




-CgN






Tuesday, June 28, 2016

Classic Corner: 2016 BET Music Awards Reaction





I had all intentions to post my annual BET Awards reactions yesterday However, I was engaged in knock down, drag out fight with the traffic of Charlotte, NC. And guess what ya'll? Charlotte won! Yup, it tried that and it did that! The Gif below may or may not be an accurate reenactment of said battle:


by Da CogNegro:


Overall, the show strengthened my stance as it relates to  the current state of black music: leery of its' future but grateful for its' past. There was also an air of  sociopolitical awareness that was a bit more apparent than in past years. But you guys didn't come here for a long drawn out introduction, you came here for the top ten list. So here we go:


1.Congratulations Deborah Lee! You finally got Beyonce to make a pit stop at your awards show. And it only took five awards, a poorly written ode, delivered by Cookie Lyons herself, a spotlight for her signed acts, screen time for her momma, her clothing line being worn by the hostess and three human sacrifices in that man made, lake by the ocean which went up to Kendrick's shoulders!

2.Why does Designer look like a peace offering that was given to us by aliens eighteen years ago?

3.Great to see the living legend Stevie Wonder this evening. He seemed to be a moving a bit slow though. Perhaps he should make an appointment to his local podiatrist so he can get a prescription for Steph Curry's new sneaker.

4.I heard Bobby Brown has a new cook book out! How appropriate being that he looks like he finished off Kerri Hilson's Popsicle along with the other five that came in the package!

5.Spike Lee is my man a hundred grand! But I can't help but wonder if  he was auditioning to be the new ringmaster for The Universal Soul Circus!

6.I have been waiting for a movie on Nat Turner for the majority of my adult life. However, with the  release of 12 Years a Slave, the revitalization of ROOTS and the debut of the show Underground, has slave fatigue diluted my excitement?

7.So the government has enough money to clone Gucci Mane, but not enough resources to make French Montana appear literate?


8.







9. Jessie Williams acceptance speech was poetic,poignant and moving. It was a timely critique on our current state of race in America minus the facade of equality and stripped of all the justifications of injustice steeped in vile bigotry that is no longer closeted. Furthermore, in the spirit of our late hero, Muhammad Ali, he called to task all of the influential individuals that filled the Microsoft theater, to action. I can only hope that our usual reactionary spirit, that's a product of trendy activism ,begins to turn into a  more pro active stance.


10.Save the best for last huh?
The Prince tributes were nothing less than phenomenal! Each performer showed the impact his purple majesty has had on ,not just their respective careers, but on the musical landscape as a whole. One last RIP to you beautiful one and all of our heroes,pioneers, and artist that we have lost this year!
1=2  CgN

     



Bonus: After Bilal's performance, I finally figured out why I made this facial expression in our picture together!











Wednesday, June 22, 2016

Corner Spotlight : PM Dawn- Sometimes I Miss You



This past weekend,we lost one of music's, not just Hip Hop's, most intuitive and expressive souls in the form of Prince B: one half of the Duo Pm Dawn. Noticed, I did not shy away from using the term Hip Hop when referencing him! Unfortunately, PM Dawn, like other acts during the early and mid 90s, were not viewed as being credible artist in the realm of this genre  due to their musical offerings being considered emotional and "soft" especially with the rise of "gangsta" rap.This resulted in them being ostracized and mocked as it related to their place in the annals of hip hop lore. Fast forward and the very foundation that such songs as Die Without You and Paper Doll laid, is now the frame work of modern rap Of course, with more explicit and crass results. Prince B was truly a poet at heart weaving abstract lines into grander narratives that truly resonated with ones in touch with the intangible. He was a true pioneer in the realm of Alternative Hip Hop, Neo Soul, and Spoken Word Poetry. In honor of his passing, we will spotlight an overlooked gem entitled, Sometimes I Miss You, which samples Al B Sure's quiet storm staple  Nite and Day.RIP Prince Be. Perhaps now, your legacy can truly set adrift on memory's bliss.








Lyrics:

(Opening Chorus)
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day

(Verse 1)
There are only whispers and shadows for me
The way things are with the way things are
And with this, I blow a kiss to disaster
Because I wish to perfect my heart
I gotta check my mind, am I in tune with you?
Do we connect within the realm of the gods?
Electric word "life" that means forever
And that's a mighty long time when you've kissed divine
So divine, as with you
The Christ within will come in the clouds
Trusting "divinity is always with you"
Trusting "this is the here and now"
Mercy's right, I gotta check my love
And I'm trying to do as such
I don't let the demons get me down
It's just, sometimes I miss you so much

(Chorus)
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day


(Verse 2)
I can envision all things to life
I can understand realistic ways
But I invent the next phase in forever
I like you rewrite the next page
It's so pristine, it's so untouched
I'm an immaculate sign of devotion
Still unseen, I'm thinking so what
Bless me cursed with colorful emotions
God says, "I guess you don't know I'm you
Because you'd know the entire 360"
The Christ that's me, the Christ that's you
Regardless constantly within me
I'm so not responsible for this
I'm just a man in love with so much
I know, love, you'll always be with me
It's just, sometimes I miss you so much


(Chorus) 
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel about you night and day
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
Sometimes I miss you
I can tell you how I feel
I can tell you how I feel
I can tell you how I fee

Monday, June 20, 2016

Reel Talk: Central Intelligence







Director: Rawnson Marshall Thurber

Release Date: June 17th, 2016

Synopsis:After he reunites with an old school mate through Facebook, a mild-mannered accountant is lured into the world of international espionage.


Review: If you've  seen one Kevin Hart film you've seen them all at this point, right? Well, surprisingly, no. Exceeding my initial expectations, Central Intelligence manages not to insult mine by providing a rather humorous affair, lead by Hart's and Dwayne The Rock Johnson's chemistry, a plot that possesses some surprising elements while  sprinkling in timely, social commentary on a variety of issues . (B) CgN






Thursday, June 16, 2016

Corner Spotlight: D.S Williams- Infact-U-Ation (Produced by Kelly Portis)

Seductive is an adjective that is usually not associated when it comes to the work of D.S. Williams. This is why his latest single, Infact-U-Ation, is such a unique offering.The narrative follows the artist's voyeuristic encounter with an unreachable object of lust and concludes with a detailed dissection of said figure's makeup and encounters . The experience is backed by a slow burn of an instrumental courtesy of Kelly Portis! Hopefully, you still have some incense left over from your last seventies party where the back up drummer for The Barclays showed up! Talk about some wild times! -CgN







Monday, June 13, 2016

Reel Talk -Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of the Shadows




Synopsis: The turtles face new challenges that include more than just menacing threats to humanity...

Directed by: Dave Green

Released: June 3rd 2016

Review:Yes the script is sophomoric at points and Micheal Bay's thumb print is clearly left on the camera lens for some scenes. Ultimately, what counts is that Teenage Mutant Ninja Turtles: Out of The Shadows is entertaining and retains the spirit of the original animated series in ways that its predecessors never have. Furthermore, the turtles aren't just mere palette swaps, but individually characterized with distinct personalities as well as humanized due to fact that they must contend with weighty issues that can not be resolved with karate chops and  kicks. For a good time, dial up the turtles! Just promise me you won't don that shirt you wore when you saw the the original 1990 incarnation. You'll embarrass your children for sure!  CgN
(B)







Wednesday, June 1, 2016

Corner Spotlight : Nao- Inhale Exhale







There's nothing more cringe worthy than hearing middle aged individuals attempt to use slang in order to appear contemporary  and "Hip". Especially if they are not aware of the meanings of said terms or the proper context in which they are used. For example, this one goes out to my fellow eighties babies, remember when your favorite uncle was on his way to the local social club and you asked if you could accompany him? His reply? "You too young to go little one. Anyway, we gonna be doing the Wild Thang all night on the  dance floor!!" Of course, you didn't have the heart to tell him what that expression meant and he may have smacked you for knowing the meaning anyway...so be it! Anyway, today's highlighted track is LIT! You gonna turn up after this! Why? Because  Nao's  Inhale Exhale is a catchy, two steep fusion of  80s electronica soul, with some funk sensibility but still can pass as  a perfect anthem to any BBQ taken place in the year 3000.This British songbird is a force to reckon with!  Yassssss, she tried that! (CgN)